You're completely useless in the revolution.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize