The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize