how can u be prego again
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
