Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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