Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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