Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
