Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
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