Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
