They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
