i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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