yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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