All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
oh god the rape fog is back!
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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