he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
PANTIES FOUND
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
