He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
