Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
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