I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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