So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
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