Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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