i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
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