Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
