I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.