Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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