He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
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