This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
You are a genius and a whore.
Randomize
