I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
