All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize
