last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
