Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
