you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize