YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
