how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Randomize
