Rock
Scissors
Fuck
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
