um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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