so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Randomize
