I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Randomize
