Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
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