i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Randomize
