Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
