I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
My bed smells like the plague
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
