you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
