I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
