I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
