oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
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Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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