ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Randomize
