i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
