You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
you made out with another girl for some wings
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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