like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True strength comes from lack of pants
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
there is glitter all over my balls
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize