It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
