I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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