I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize